How many times have I thought that..Here we go again! It seems like we just got here! I don't want to move! I can't do this again! I don't want to leave the friends I just made! I don't want the kids to have to start over!
Yep! Here we go again!
We have two choices...we can either be Happy or Miserable. I choose the be Happy.And like other military wives the world over, I learn all about the New Post we are going to. I will even make it sound better than it really is, anything to keep the kids happy. I can make any house a home, make the husband and kids happy..but I have to keep ME happy.
When the kids were little, we had just moved to a new post. I didn't know anyone, missing all the friends I had just left. I was miserable, stuck at home while Tom was off doing what soldiers do. I decided then , I have to be more than Tom's wife, more than the kids Mom. I am a Stay at Home Mom by choice, I wouldn't want it any other way, but there had to be more than the play groups or volunteering at the kids school.
I look back on that as my Winter of Discontent. I had serious growing pains for months, had wondered if I would come out the other side married to a soldier.I loved him dearly, but just didn't know if I could keep on moving every few years, starting over somewhere else. What saved US was realizing I had to take care of ME.
My advice to all military wives, whether newlyweds or married for 15 yrs..Find something for YOU. I am an artist, but didn't realize it until I had to decide which way my life would go. I have sold my work from post to post. I have taught classes for money, but at the same time, I have taught them to other wives for free.
Get out there and meet your neighbors. You might be surprised at how many other lonely wives are out there. Espically when the husbands are TDY. Make the first move, sure you will be leaving in a few years, and will hate to say good-gye...but you just might walk right past the best friend you will ever have.
Get involved with your communtiy and your unit. Life long friendships are waiting to happen.
Get out of the house! go explore!
Discover your new city, even if your husband is in the field. I learned Kansas City and the surrounding area with 2 kids strapped in car seats.15 years later, I still get lost and don't think a thing about it. I am WOMAN I can ask for directions.
No matter how bad you think your quarters are, or how bad your rental is...Home is what WE make it. The first thing I do after the boxes are unpacked is get the pictures on the walls as fast as I can. I have put pictures in our Hold Baggage if it was going to take months to get our household goods. 6 months-2 years...it doesn't matter..I have to feel at home.
Get the kids involved with their activities, the sooner they get out there..they sooner they will make friends. Mine are older now, so it takes them a while to find that "Best Friend" but like us, they eventually meet the one! If they see you mope around, wishing you were still living in Va. or where ever..they will too!
I love the military life, love seeing new places, doing new things and meeting new people.Surround yourself with postive people. If you hear someone say..I Hate this post, and the town..run as fast as you can. If you have a special talent, and that means making that cheese cake that melts in your mouth...offer to teach your neighbors how to do it! We are military wives, all in this together.
We will leave Ft.Benning June 2000, and sure, I will be thinking..Here we go again...but I will be excited! I have another Best Friend out there somewhere..I just haven't met her yet.